Redefining happiness in marriage

I bought the book, Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas (https://amzn.to/2KOv8hB) when my husband and I were separated. I found myself repeatedly putting it down every time I tried to read it. The subtitle, "What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy," is what did me in! I simply thought, God wants me to be happy too right!?! I did eventually read it and it was amazing!!! I'm going to be blunt here folks......where does it say in the Bible that God intended for us to be happy??? No where. In fact, happiness in the Bible is discussed in terms of how are you "serving, laying down your life for others and for Christ?" I know it sounds simplistic, but I go back to a plaque my mom had when I was younger that said, "J-O-Y is Jesus, Others, You"- in that order. When we put Christ first in our lives, then Others, and lastly, our own desires, then "the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard our hearts and minds." It doesn't say "happiness" will come. When we lay down our own selfish desires and serve others, whether it's a spouse or a stranger, then we are becoming more like Christ and "joy" will follow. I would challenge you today, to seek to be more joyful, holy, and content with what God has given you and to stop searching for "happiness."

1. Ask God to change your heart and your mind regarding your thoughts of happiness. We can be joyful even when things are crappy. Just look at Paul in the Bible. His greatest time of ministry occurred when he was in a nasty jail cell for two years! He didn't whine and complain about the jail food, or lack thereof, or that he couldn't receive fresh linens, the finest amenities, or the opportunity for an upgrade. Joy is not happiness. Joy is a feeling of peace, elation, contentment, that ONLY comes by trusting and claiming AHEAD OF TIME, that you know the end result WILL BE good, even though you can't see it. You know it's going to be good, because God is FOR YOU, not against you. He chose you. He's the Captain of your team:)

2. It all begins with spending time with Christ on a DAILY basis, reading his word, seeking him and doing what you know is the right thing in God's eyes, despite what your feelings tell you. As Ezekiel 20 says, ".....act out of who you are [in Christ], not out of how you feel. Act in a way that would evoke honor, not blasphemy..." MSG

If you don't feel you know who you are in Christ, please see my previous blog on "God's Sovereignty Prayer."